There goes my New Years resolution

Posts from Jan. 1, 2018 to the present. Plus important announcements. (ICD warning sounds)

Moderator: Moderators

Post Reply
User avatar
rcarroll
Posts: 474
Joined: April 3rd, 2009, 7:43 am

There goes my New Years resolution

Post by rcarroll » March 15th, 2018, 4:59 pm

I am not a big one for making New Years resolutions but this year I decided to make one which I thought was well within the realm of possibilities. My resolution was to "Not have a hospital admission in 2018." What I mean by that is any Emergency Department episode that ends up with an inpatient episode ie Short Stay Observation Unit, ICU, CCU or any other ward.

I forgot about my Syncopy which happens every time I start coughing. No big deal when I am sitting or hanging onto something and I can ride the wave without hitting the deck. However when you work in a major hospital and a syncopy event strikes whilst sitting in your seat and you still manage to find the floor in your face, you just know your New Years resolution is about to fail as you faintly hear through the Syncopy fog a code blue being called for you. So there I was with the usual ECG and heart monitor sticky pads placed all over and a catheter stuck in the back of my right hand all the while Freddy Mercury is singing "Another one bites the dust!"

So just to make sure that this New Years resolution is dead, blood has started to show up in my number twos so I am off for a colonoscopy next month. The only upside is the Austin Hospital is public hospital so when I got admitted last time I went in as a private patient which means there is no payment gap and the hospital pays for the Private Insurance excess of $500. Since there is a twelve month waiting list for the colonoscopy at the Austin, I will get it done in a private hospital across the road. So here is the kicker the public hospital has already paid the excess for the year so I won't be out of pocket on this next adventure. So now I can dedicate my time and energy worrying about the big "C" ... Nah that's not going to happen!
Bob Carroll

Blue Screened in Feb 2009
Auto reboot device installed
Oh yeah! I also take drugs

User avatar
mrag
Posts: 4355
Joined: February 10th, 2009, 4:56 pm
Location: The Former Mushroom Capital of World when America was great

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by mrag » March 15th, 2018, 5:12 pm

Bob, quite sorry to hear about your recent turn of events, but as this relates to medical care and how possibly handled in the US, this must be considered a political statement. Unacceptable. Please suck it up and bring us more plain support worthy details of having an ICD implanted in your chestal cavity.

Feel for you Bro, but we got rules
"The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge" S Hawking

User avatar
ROBO Pop
Posts: 4342
Joined: September 14th, 2009, 2:36 pm
Location: the Oval Office

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by ROBO Pop » March 15th, 2018, 5:13 pm

Wow Bob. One question, can I have your golf clubs? Oh and since you're down under (sounds ominous) are the heads on the wrong end of the shaft? Oh and when did you start referring to yourself as the ""Big C""?
Broken Heart
Nobody has ever survived life, but I'm trying...
My story and sticking to it
http://www.icdsupportgroup.org/board/vi ... 97&p=91375

User avatar
KansasAl
Posts: 593
Joined: April 11th, 2012, 7:30 pm

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by KansasAl » March 15th, 2018, 5:25 pm

Hey Bob, lucky you on the hospital switch up, I hear they use lube on the camera probe at the private hospitals.

Well wishes.

User avatar
freckles1880
Moderator
Posts: 8664
Joined: April 18th, 2009, 7:19 pm
Location: Broomfield, Colorado

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by freckles1880 » March 16th, 2018, 8:26 am

At least you can get some answers pretty fast.
I know I have posted this before but it has been a while. :

"Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.
This is from Newshound; Dave Barry’s colonoscopy journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis. Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn’t really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, quote, ‘HE’S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!’

I left Andy’s office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called ‘MoviPrep,’ which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America’s enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous. Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn’t eat any
solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with fewer flavors. Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, and then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.)

Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, ‘a loose, watery bowel movement may result.’ This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.
MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don’t want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the e procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurt age. I was thinking; What if I spurt on Andy? How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn’t thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to bum your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was ‘Dancing Queen’ by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, ‘Dancing Queen’ had to be the least appropriate.

‘You want me to turn it up?’ said Andy, from somewhere behind me. ‘Ha ha,’ I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea, really, I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling ‘Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,’ and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood. Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous a physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:
1. ‘Take it easy, Doc. You’re boldly going where no man has gone before!
2. ‘Find Amelia Earhart yet?’
3. ‘Can you hear me NOW?’
4. ‘Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?’
5. ‘You know, in Arkansas, we’re now legally married.’
6. ‘Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?’
7. ‘You put your left hand in; you take your left hand out.’
8. ‘Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!’
9. ‘If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit!’
10. ‘Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.’
11. ‘You used to be an executive at Enron, didn’t you?’
12. ‘God, now I know why I am not gay.’
And the best one of all....
13. ‘Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?’ "

wavhi

User avatar
rcarroll
Posts: 474
Joined: April 3rd, 2009, 7:43 am

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by rcarroll » March 16th, 2018, 9:18 am

mrag wrote:
March 15th, 2018, 5:12 pm
Bob, quite sorry to hear about your recent turn of events, but as this relates to medical care and how possibly handled in the US, this must be considered a political statement. Unacceptable. Please suck it up and bring us more plain support worthy details of having an ICD implanted in your chestal cavity.

Feel for you Bro, but we got rules
Sorry mrag you are absolutely right. So here goes my ICD slanted story:

Hi everyone, they are going to turn off the defib part of my CRT-D while they ram a garden hose with a GoPro stuck on the end, up my arse! >:)
Bob Carroll

Blue Screened in Feb 2009
Auto reboot device installed
Oh yeah! I also take drugs

User avatar
Leah
Posts: 1249
Joined: May 1st, 2008, 1:50 pm

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by Leah » March 17th, 2018, 10:45 am

I had colonoscopy before. They didn’t shut it off. They disabled it with a manganet.

User avatar
freckles1880
Moderator
Posts: 8664
Joined: April 18th, 2009, 7:19 pm
Location: Broomfield, Colorado

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by freckles1880 » March 17th, 2018, 10:52 am

Leah wrote:
March 17th, 2018, 10:45 am
I had colonoscopy before. They didn’t shut it off. They disabled it with a magnet.
It is how you say it. They just want to make sure you don't have an event (shock) while the procedure is being completed. They have staff there to protect you just in case.

wavhi
Bob

Medtronic-Visia AF implanted 7-8-2016 stayed with the with 6947 Sprint Quattro Secure lead. Original ICD implant 2-4-2009. ICD turned off 10-6-17 as stage 4 lung cancer taking over.
Major heart attack, carcinogenic shock and quad bypass 10-13-08 post myocardial infarction, old inferior MI complicated by shock and CHF, combined, Atherosclerosis, abdominal aortic Aneurysm, Seroma 7 cm, left leg. Stent in the left main vein 10-7-2014

My "Wardens" are my bride of 54+ years and my daughters.

User avatar
Melissa
Posts: 209
Joined: November 8th, 2010, 7:24 pm
Contact:

Re: There goes my New Years resolution

Post by Melissa » March 23rd, 2018, 4:58 pm

Interesting read. Loved the colonoscopy story. Hits home as someone who has had 6 colonoscopies at the young age of 44. (I had to start at age 30). And interesting info about the syncopy. My husband had an episode of syncopy for the first time ever at age 44 while he was coughing down a piece of dry cake. I had checked on him to make sure he wasn't choking and I was certain he wasn't because he was able to talk back to me so I knew he was moving air. But he kept coughing and coughing and just could not clear this dry cake. Then he passed out. We were totally freaked because we were on a cruise ship in the middle of the Caribbean Ocean! My brother jumped up to do the hyemlic procedure and my sister in law who is a nurse started telling him no not To do it because she didn't think he was choking. I of course was just screaming for help. Just about that time (about 5 seconds after he passed out), he started coming to. It was the scariest experience. But now we know it may happen again sometime!
Melissa - dx cardiomyopathy in 2004 due to childhood chemotherapy; Boston Scientific CRT-D implanted 8/10, meds: Toprol XL 100mg/day, aldactone 25mg/day. Second ICD implanted 3/18, also Boston Scientific CRT-D

Post Reply